The student paper at UT Austin announced today to all their fine young scholars that the Texas department of safety has decided Mexico should not be on the destination list for Texas students. Mexico breathed a collective sigh of relief as both narcotic crime and sexual assaults will all drop off with the absence of the fine young scholars. Meanwhile, back in safe-n-sane Texas, a man walked into Wal-Mart this weekend with two guns (I heard AK-47 on the local news) and started a shoot out. This follows months of church burnings south of Dallas and a tax protester smashing a plane into an IRS building in Austin. Besides, fine young scholars will be safer here, in Texas, from all that Mexican debauchery.
Latin Americans, on the other hand, are perfectly safe when they come to Texas. Just ask Jaqueline Saburido (below) who had a great time in Austin, TX.